Spring is my favorite time of year.
The flowers return, our bodies and minds defrost, and energy seeps into everything like honey.
I could feel it this morning.
Everything inside of me felt a little more alive.
Yesterday, I went to a restorative yoga class.
It’s been a while since I’ve been to a studio and I could feel myself growing more and more nervous.
There’s something about doing something you haven’t done in a while. Particularly in front of people.
Would I even remember what a yoga mat is?
Have I been doing yoga completely and utterly wrong at home?
I laid my mat out, gathered props and felt my bare feet on the hardwood floor.
I sat still and took in my surroundings.
The regulars rolled around and moaned or propped their feet up against the wall.
I sat cross-legged and did my best to remember what it feels like to practice good posture.
I carried my gaze across the room, catching a gentle smile from a lady across the way.
The kind of smile that seemed to know my inner dialogue.
Like she could hear, “roll your shoulders back, raise your head to the ceiling, and try not to stare at anyone.”
Perhaps she recognized the look in my eyes.
Maybe a kind stranger smiled at her once when she felt out of place.
As we entered into child’s pose I took a minute to think about myself as I age.
I saw myself with grey hair.
I was sitting at a desk in a sunroom.
The room overlooked the water and I wrote.
Maybe I was writing letters to loved ones or stories of my life.
I had wrinkles on my hands but I didn’t mind them.
I thanked myself for taking time to be limber now.
For thinking of her ahead of time,
for learning to cherish her experiences now and seeing her as a part of my current existence.
It’s all one story, she is me and I am her.
Though time may be linear and our dynamics may seem to be one sided.
Thought it could be fact that she will only be affected by me and not the other way around.
I like to think that by keeping her in mind I can absorb a bit of her wisdom.